Frustration

After coming back from NLDS, I have been feeling so weird. I started to get excited about the new generation, the blood of AIESEC cos I see hopes and future in AIESEC, but sadly I don't see hopes in myelf.

Pressure and depression is bothering me recently though I'm trying to handle it. Obviously I am a very result oriented person. Doing things but not generating results is something horribly unacceptable to me, not point to other people but myself. I'm not perfectionist but I know what I should make and what to get done, how come????? No results at all! I hate that.

Hopeless and helpeless kept annoying me.. maybe thats why AIESEC is a journey. No one said that everything is going to be smooth and always be the way you want it. I'm fighting, but fighting alone.

If I have none results.. how to convince myself to take a further step in another stage of AIESEC? Maybe it's stupid to think like that but it's something I really believe and I hope I can get through from it.

OK too much bullshit, gonna stop today.. I should let the frustration go.